Monday, May 28, 2018

Why We Fail



1. We see success as being determined by external factors. (So, if I fail its due to my circumstances or someone else’s fault.) 

This takes away any sense of power and keeps us stuck in failure and helplessness.

2. We have personal blind spots.
Sometimes we keep failing but we’re blind to the fact that there is something we are doing that is causing us to fail. Failure factors could be related to our communication style, our attitudes, lack of knowledge and ability, pursuing something that doesn’t suit our gifts and talents, and so on.

3. Self-sabotage.

Sometimes we don’t feel we deserve to succeed so unconsciously we do something that causes us to fail. This includes getting stuck on self-limiting thoughts (E.g., “I could never …; I don’t deserve …”).

4. We feel ambivalent (indecisive) about the goals you’ve set.

We often set a goal that is someone else’s goal so we’re not sure if it’s what we want ourselves. That affects our motivation, and our will to succeed.

5. We FEAR of change.

All success brings some change – and that can feel relatively threatening. And we’re often comfortable with our life as it is now – and so we wonder if success will really make us happier.

6. Pressure from others who don’t want you to succeed.

It’s very common for our peers to be threatened by success, and we know they’ll be sarcastic or mean if we succeed. Therefore, we don’t give it our best shot because we recognize the cost will be social isolation, or rejection by our friends or other respected peer groups.

TMJ
05/28/2018