Monday, November 18, 2013
Wednesday, November 13, 2013
Friday, November 8, 2013
In The Shadows
A man came from
across the Jordan River. He was from a poor family in an out of the way place. Moody
would be the best way to describe his demeanor because he seemed prone to big
mood swings. One day euphoric, and the next day he might appear as though he
was depressed. His appearance is a little sketchy at best, but we do know he
was “hairy.” The 13 years he spent in ministry might seem short, but the drama
involved would have been something to see. There are only 7 miracles accredited
to him during his time in ministry. Much like the man, those miracles were
larger than life and worthy of much respect. Timid would not be a good word to
use when trying to illustrate his personality. Who is this man? Why it is
Elijah the prophet. He was great in many ways. He is by far one of the most
remembered of all the Old Testament prophets, but was he the most accomplished?
There was another man who came from
a wealthy home located in Abel Meholah which was in Israel proper. All
indicators tell us he was even-tempered. The Biblical account also tells us, in
contrast to Elijah, he was “bald.” (II Kings 2:23) His tenure of 25 years in
ministry is to be admired by modern-day ministers who can usually only hope to
last for that long. He managed to be credited with 14 miracles, although they
were minor when compared to Elijah’s great exhibitions of God’s power. Unlike
Elijah who dealt with powerful, worldly figures, this man was at home with the
common people. His ministry even started slow in the eyes of most because he
spent the first ten years ministering to Elijah. By now one might have already
guessed his name, Elisha.
Both Elijah and Elisha were
appointed by God to be the lead prophets of Israel. They both acted as trainers
of younger prophets. Their miracles also played key roles in the judgment and
restoration of Israel.
There are many insights to be found
in the lives of these two men of God. The first thing that jumps out would be
that God has made each of us for a unique role in His service. Notice that
their key differences were suited to the different roles God wanted them to
play in his plan. Elijah's bold personality and miraculous deeds were needed to
call the nation back to God from the brink of total apostasy. Elisha's
compassionate miracles for the common Israelite provided them a needed reminder
of God's faithfulness to them when they were faithful to him.
The second lesson comes in on the
heels of the first lesson. Success is
faithfully fulfilling God's role for you, not how you compare to others or how
much approval you get from others. Whose life was more successful:
Elijah's or Elisha's? Most who lived during Elijah's life and afterward
regarded him as more successful than Elisha. Throughout his life, Elisha lived
in Elijah's shadow. Was he then less successful? Elisha asked to receive a
double portion of Elijah's spirit, and God granted his request. Elisha never
had the kind of public fame Elijah had, but his life was successful in the only
eyes that really matter, the eyes of God.
From a ministers perspective empathy
overflows for Elisha. Having spent most of my working years owning my own
company, serving under the leadership of others is a point of personal
struggle. I see so many in the ministry today doing things that they are not equipped
to do. Hence they seem to be ineffective where they serve. The importance of
serving in the area God has designed us to serve will make or break a ministry.
In the 12 years I have spent in the ministry I have seen so many people, who
were called by God, but serving in the wrong area become discouraged. Some of
those have even left the faith altogether. In contrast I have met several who
serve where they are called and gifted. Many of whom are the unseen heroes of
the faith. They serve faithfully and never get the accolades that a senior
pastor might receive, but they are rewarded in ways that are beyond the
imagination.
I once imagined my life as a
combination of Jeremiah and Elijah. To some extent the Jeremiah comparison
continues to be valid, but these days Elisha’s is a better fit that Elijah. I
thought I was in my area of giftedness, but God has opened several doors I
never noticed before. My role has always been quiet, behind the scenes,
educating people in small group settings. Being in the shadow of the “Pastor”
seems to have been my role, and I am blessed in the ministry God has given me.
Thursday, November 7, 2013
The Truth Shall Set You Free
Truth, when accompanied by direction and encouragement,
provides an uncomplicated way to talk with people in a counselor-client
relationship. The Bible teaches, truth without love ugly, but love without
truth can be equally ugly. When I show the love of God to others I must offer
His truth, His admonishments, and His encouragement, or I have not represented
an accurate picture of the true God. Without equality in all areas I only
portray a caricature of God, not the real character of God.
The Truth Shall Set You Free
One
of the most basic things I learned from the study of counseling is that
everyone has a unique approach. Every client seeking help will vary from the
next and will respond differently to a range of therapeutic approaches. Much
like the clients, every therapist will be different from the next having come
from diverse “schools of thought” and possessing various experiences which have
shaped the way he or she helps clients.
Overview
I believe effective counseling needs to speak the truth in love, be rooted in scripture, guided by the Holy Spirit, accurate, and mature. But even with all of these attributes, counseling must include those portions of truth found in secular psychology. A Biblical foundation is essential to correctly diagnose problems presented to a counselor. The ultimate root of all of the problems people experience is sin. First, sin separates us from God. Second, sin also separates us from each other, and that separation is revealed through sociological problems. Finally, sin separates us from ourselves which, in this case, reveals itself through psychological problems. I believe the Bible teaches that there is the ability to have substantial healing in all of these separations.Fundamental Principles
There
are some fundamental truths that guide my philosophy of counseling. The
principal belief is that God did not make us to live totally isolated,
independent lives separated from one another. In the Bible God uses the analogy
of sheep to describe people. The analogy is referring to the fact that sheep
are animals that need a lot of care. God is the Chief Shepherd, but He also
appoints others to share in the responsibility of guiding those he has created.
That is where, I believe, counseling fits into the equation. Although there are
offices within the church at large, there is still a need for counseling those
who might never be able to have personal contact with pastors, elders, or other
“church” leadership. When is counseling necessary? There are some specific
times, and I will no doubt leave out one or two, when counseling is appropriate
and necessary. Counseling is necessary when someone faces major decisions such
as marriage, career choice, and spiritual direction. Counseling is also
necessary when someone faces crisis issues such as divorce, job loss, major or
long-term illness, financial loss, the death of someone near, and physical,
mental, emotional, verbal, and sexual abuse.
It is necessary at times of unresolved conflict as might happen in
family relations, employer-employee relations, other social relations, church
relations, and civil relations. Moreover counseling may become mandatory when
someone faces addictions such as substance abuse (drug, alcohol, nicotine, and
food), sexual addictions, work, ministry, or entertainment addictions, and
fantasy addictions. There are also times of emotional needs such as fear,
anger, jealousy, bitterness, hate, suicide, depression, doubt, and guilt when
counseling can be of benefit. There are so many situations that could
necessitate counseling such as needing excessive amount of sleep, getting too
little sleep, or having nightmares, excessive daydreams, and when you
experience physical problems without a known physical cause. Counseling, even
within the church setting is important when someone becomes spiritually unsure
or confused about salvation from sin, a relationship with God, their spiritual
future, or living a proper spiritual life. There are Biblical standards that
form the basis for my approach to counseling and helping others in general.
Throughout the New Testament there runs a system, a pattern for helping others
find their way to healthy living. The Bible speaks of truth as the foundation
of this system. Ephesians 4:24-25 gives us this mandate, “And put on the new
nature (the regenerate self) created in God's image, [Godlike] in true
righteousness and holiness. Therefore, rejecting all falsity and being done now
with it, let everyone express the truth with his neighbor, for we are all parts
of one body and members one of another.”
Truth
Truth is an interesting word. Jesus used the phrase, “I
tell you the truth,” approximately seventy-eight times (NIV) in the New
Testament. Truth must be transmitted between counselor and client for there to
be real break through and progress during counseling sessions. If either party
holds back, or lies the problem might never be resolved, or at best, the
therapy would be akin to placing a small bandage on a four inch knife wound.
Schaeffer (1968) made the issue of truth a pivotal issue when talking and
counseling with people, “All people, whether they realize it or not, function
in the framework of some concept of truth.” (p.143) I absolutely affirm his
belief in human nature. People are true to their belief system. If their belief
system is based on untruth, that is, if they do not have a true picture of
reality, their lives will continually bump into the obstacles that are placed
before them. However, if someone bases their self-concept on the truth of the
way things really are, although not always smooth, life will make more sense,
and good choices will become easier to make. For instance, if a client presents
a problem with alcohol, they would be exhibiting a belief through behavior
inconsistent with the truth presented in scripture. The Bible gives us this
truth in Romans 13:13-14, “Let us live and conduct ourselves honorably and
becomingly as in the [open light of] day, not in reveling (carousing) and
drunkenness, not in immorality and debauchery (sensuality and licentiousness),
not in quarreling and jealousy. But clothe yourself with the Lord Jesus Christ
(the Messiah), and make no provision for [indulging] the flesh [put a stop to
thinking about the evil cravings of your physical nature] to [gratify its]
desires (lusts).” The next step beyond recognizing the truth is admonishment.
Admonishment
In
1Thessalonians 5:14 the Apostle Paul writes these words, “And we earnestly
beseech you, brethren, admonish (warn and seriously advise) those who are out
of line [the loafers, the disorderly, and the unruly]; encourage the timid and
fainthearted, help and give your support to the weak souls, [and] be very
patient with everybody [always keeping your temper].” Although this passage
deals with believers, I believe we should apply the same principles to those
who are believers and those who have not yet believed. When talking to
believers we can, more often than not, appeal to scripture to help someone
understand where they have drifted from the correct path. When dealing with non-believers
our approach should entail illuminating the problem. I believe the gift of
discernment is mandatory for someone who counsels others. One must be able to
see past the conversation to find the core of the issue at hand. Asking good
questions are the keys to the admonishment. If I ask the right questions, I can
help the client come to the proper conclusion about their situation, and
hopefully help them discover the remedy for themselves. As in the drinking
scenario a therapist might point out the negative economic side to drinking.
They might also point out the negative relational aspects by asking, “Does your
personality improve when you drink? Do you tend to have marital troubles while
drinking?” There are many other questions one might ask, but the point of
admonishment should be to help the client visualize the problem. Once the
client has the problem identified in a somewhat tangible way, the next step is
proceeding to encourage them to better future behavior.
Encouragement
and Comfort
It is my job to
pass on the comfort and encouragement I have received from God. My inspiration
comes from a great passage in 2Corinthians 1:3-5,
3Blessed
be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of sympathy (pity
and mercy) and the God [Who is the Source] of every comfort (consolation and
encouragement),
4Who comforts (consoles and encourages) us in every trouble
(calamity and affliction), so that we may also be able to comfort (console and
encourage) those who are in any kind of trouble or distress, with the comfort
(consolation and encouragement) with which we ourselves are comforted (consoled
and encouraged) by God.
5For just as Christ's [[a]own] sufferings fall to our lot [b][as they overflow upon His disciples, and we
share and experience them] abundantly, so through Christ comfort (consolation
and encouragement) is also [shared and experienced] abundantly by us.
The Bible says I
am to share the encouragement and comfort I have received from God with others
who as suffering. Having been through trials of my own I often use reflections
of those times to help show the power of God to those I counsel. When speaking
with someone in the alcohol abuse scenario I have been using, I would try to
reveal to them the underlying issue that causes them to drink, and then help
them formulate a mental picture of what life would be like without drinking. I
always try to end with showing them how, with God, all things are possible.
Final
Truth
The truth saves
and gives life. It protects us, and helps to guide us into life-giving
relationships. I believe the truth, given in a proper manner, can warn people
of danger. I believe it can also point out the path to safety. I believe truth,
admonishment, and encouragement combine to form a solid three-fold system for
helping people to overcome their problems in a Christian setting. For me, the
most important quote I have ever read concerning psychology and counseling
comes from Dr. Henry Cloud, “Psychology’s sound research and theories have been
very helpful in dealing with people’s problems, but they actually only serve to
illuminate and support the principles of growth and healing that have always
been in the Bible.” (p.201)
References
Cloud, D. H.,
& Townsend, D. J. (2004). How People Grow: What the Bible Reveals
About Personal Growth
(New Ed ed.). Grand Rapids, Michigan: Zondervan.
Schaeffer, F.
(1968). God Who is There: Speaking Historic Christianity into
the TwentiethCentury..
Chicago: Inter-Varsity Press.
Zondervan.
(2006). Amplified Topical Reference Bible (Bible Amplified).
Grand Rapids, Michigan: Zondervan.
Monday, November 4, 2013
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