Things I've Learned About Suffering

Most people look for simple/quick answers to just about every life event. In the Book of Job, God presents the basic argument that life is too complicated for the simple answers we all seek. When we try to analyze our situations by looking to God for simple answers, we are most often asking Him for information, that if He gave it to us, we would never be able to understand.

God is telling Job, and us, that He (God) is the only one who can deal with the trials that often come into our lives. Our role, at this point in any situation, is to trust God and continue to bring Him glory by our responses to the good and the bad.

Although Job's life was filled with tragedy, he continued to "worship" God in those times. The Book of Job gives us a great picture of God's response to Job's faithfulness, "and Job died, and old man, and full of days" (Job 42:17, RSV). 

Human suffering continues to be a result of Satan's original challenge to the hierarchy God established in the beginning.

Job, as far as we know while alive, was never given an answer for his suffering. Likewise, we will more than likely never have exhaustive answers to suffering we face in life.

The lesson from Job is that there will be times of suffering and hardship in life and we will never have the total picture.

Most of the time God will not reveal the "reason(s)" for the struggle, but our role is to trust His plan and to bring Him glory through our actions in those times of struggle.

Our witness before a lost world often depends more on how we behave (actions) than what we say.

Bottom Line:

We need to trust God's plan, because life is too complicated to handle alone.

~TheBassPlayer

Verba docent, exempla trahunt
"Words instruct, illustrations lead"

Understanding People

If I understand you, then I can be more accurate in my interactions with you.

Understanding another person is perhaps the second most difficult thing to do (the most difficult thing is understanding yourself).

People are driven by complex and deep motivations, that if you can understand you can support and shape.

They have limited capabilities and are shaped by past events in their lives - many of the early ones of which may have been, at the time, traumatic.

They infer meaning that is different from what is really happening and formulate intent using faulty logic and decision processes.

They have differing preferences that lead them to behave as different 'personality types'.

...and all you need to do is understand all this.

What's can you do???

I'm glad you asked!

Always spend as much time as possible trying to understand people so that you can explain their past actions and predict their likely future actions.

Demonstrating your understanding, when coupled with care and concern, is a powerful way of building trust.

When talking with them, use the same language and models as they do, so they can understand what you say in their own terms.

You can also use your understanding to build tension and, therefore, persuade them.

TJ

Actions have Consequences

 

There is no reset button in life. 

You can’t take anything back, and you can’t undo anything. 

All of your actions have consequences, and the things you say and do today will have a lasting impact on the rest of your life.

You have to understand that, and you have to be aware of it while making both small and big decisions throughout your day.

Unknown 

 

TJ

Understanding Others

We commonly believe that we understand others better than they understand us.

The rationale for this stems from our external, objective viewpoint and the assumption that the other person has a significant blind-self, while our own blind-self is small.

There is also asymmetry in the reverse situation -- we believe we understand ourselves better than others understand us and may feel insulted if they try to show they understand us more than we do.

The same effect happens for groups, where the in-group believes they understand out-groups better than out-groups understand them.

Overall, this is a position where we generally assume we know more than others, perhaps because we know more about what we know.

TJ

7 Things We Need To Start Doing

1. Spend more time with the right kind of people.
That is, the kind of people who value and accept you, and will always love you unconditionally.

2. Don’t ignore your problems. They won’t just go away.
You need to face and confront them.

3. Decide to be yourself, with your own identity.
Don’t live to please others, it only leads to grief!

4. Instead of focusing on failure, see it simply as a lesson.
We all make mistakes. It’s what you do after you make a mistake that really counts.

5. Be nicer and much more understanding with yourself.
Choose to cut yourself some slack and try to be less critical.

6. Enjoy and appreciate the blessings in your life.
We often overlook the fact that there are plenty of things that have gone right!

7. Help others believe in themselves.
You can make a difference in another person’s life.


TJ