1. You can tell that they are
trustworthy; you feel safe with them.
2. They demonstrate unconditional
acceptance, genuineness and empathy.
3. They try to understand things
from your perspective.
4. You can tell that they are for
you.
5. They believe in you. They have a
sense of hope and confidence in your ability to change, or find a solution that
will work for you.
6. They give you their full and
undivided attention when you are sharing with them.
(They never seem impatient,
disinterested or distracted.)
7. They listen without interrupting.
8. In a counseling session, you do
around 80% of the talking; they only talk about 20% of the time.
9. You can tell they are interested
in what you have to say. What matters to you also matters to them. You set the
agenda – not them.
10. They help you to find your own
solutions instead of giving advice or telling you what you should do.
11. They are warm, calm, sensitive,
caring, open, patient and concerned.
12. You feel that you can be your
true self when you are with them. You don’t feel judged, criticized or
written-off.
13. You get the sense that they
respect and like who you are.
14. You feel valued by them; they
see you as the expert on your own life.
TJ
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