Broken

 Let someone love you just the way you are - as flawed as you might be, as unattractive as you sometimes feel, and as unaccomplished as you think you are. 

To believe you must hide of all the parts of you that are broken, out of fear that someone else is incapable of loving what is less than perfect, is to believe that sunlight is incapable of entering a broken window and illuminating a dark room.

 

TJ

Who Do You Deserve?

You deserve someone who loves you with their whole heart. Someone who never puts you down. Not even in those times that the discussions get heated. Someone who knows what you are able to accomplish, and celebrates the little victories as they come. 

Someone who is not intimidated by your strength. Someone who will call you out when you are being obstinate, but never piles guilt on you for your flaws. 

Love doesn’t punish. Always remember the person you love is just as broken as you are when they miss the mark. No one is perfect. Never try to hold someone you love to that level. 

Seek out someone who is patient, forgives, and is quick to apologize when they are in the wrong. Love someone who is kind, humble, and shows empathy with ease. Not only with you, but also with the homeless on the street or a stranger in a store. 

Never settle for less than someone who is kind, compassionate, and show common courtesy to all.

TJ

STOP...

1. Hanging out with people who don’t appreciate you.

2. Running from your problems and hiding from the truth.

3. Acting as a door mat and putting yourself last.

4. Longing for the past and the way things used to be.

5. Beating yourself up for the stupid things you did.

6. Holding onto grudges that only drag you down.

7. Trying to be perfect – as that’s just a waste of time.

TJ

You are Fooling Yourself

“C’mon! Let’s see what you’ve got. Just take your best shot…” 

It’s a great line from a Styx song with a chorus that repeats

“You’re fooling yourself and you don’t believe it. You’re kidding yourself, and you don’t believe it…”

The twist in the song is that “fooling yourself” doesn’t refer to an over-inflated ego or an unrecognized flaw in yourself. Instead, the song refers to unrealized potential, to an angry young man’s failure to see that his future, in reality, looks quite bright to those looking from the outside.

Sure, there are people who fool themselves (or try to fool others) with conceited over-estimations of their own abilities and contributions. However, I think that more of us fool ourselves in another way, by falsely believing we are less capable than we really are.

These self-imposed limitations cause us to give up or ,more often, not even try at all. We convince ourselves that we shouldn’t try because we can’t succeed. We protect ourselves from failure by doing only what we have already succeeded in doing before.

As a result, our possibilities become narrower, basically verifying that we are, indeed, limited.

This happens so easy because we are both creatures of habit and seekers of comfort. The saddest thing is that we only are fooling ourselves if we use our routines and limitations as security blankets.

In an age of rapidly expanding information, in a volatile economy, in a time of confusion around the world… can you honestly say that what you know and do today will always be enough? Real security comes from remaining open to trying new things. We have to adapt and risking failure for the purpose of self-development to achieve everything we are capable of achieving. 

As you read this, I hear the excuses piling up. You are fooling yourself if you are thinking “I can’t,” “I’ve never,” “I don’t know how,” “I’m not…” The truth is that you can, you will, you’ll learn and you are. However, remember it only becomes the truth when you believe it.

You Want PROOF? 

When you were at your very lowest points – less educated than you are now, less independent than you are now, and less experienced than you are now, you did new things every single day. You built skills that went way beyond your current capabilities. You were just a child. Even so, you took your best shot. You tried. You tried again and again if necessary. You did not fear failure, so you did not fail.

Consider what you are telling yourself. 

Challenge it. Don’t just take the easy way out.

Break free from self-limiting beliefs and stop fooling yourself. “Get up, get back on your feet, you’re the one they can’t beat…”

TJ

Can You Capture A Moment?

Strange how strong the instinct is, to see something incredible, and reach for a camera. As if to lend it some credibility, to prove that it's real, that 'I WAS HERE.' 

We live our lives in moments. Those rare experiences we stop to notice, and carry with us, in the hopes of stringing them together, trying to tell a story. But even in the moment, you can feel it start to fade.

 So you try to capture it, and convert it into something that will last longer than just a flash. And over time a photo feels more real than it's subject. It lets you build a version of the world that you can take with you. 

A world flattened, and simple. A world that doesn't change. That fits in the frame. A little brighter and more colorful. With everything under control. You can travel the world looking for memories, and still find yourself standing behind a camera waiting for the world to hold still. 

With every click of the shutter, you're trying to press Pause on your life. If only so you can feel a little more comfortable moving on living in a world stuck on Play. 

A part of you knows you can't take it with you but that doesn't stop you from trying.

 "What if I could stay just a little longer?" "What if we didn't have to go?" 

We try to capture moments as if we're afraid they'll escape, but they'll get away eventually. 

Take one last look. One more shot. 

So years from now you can flip back through, and try to relive it all over again.

But maybe even then, you'll be thinking to yourself, "Ah well. I guess you had to be there."

TJ