Photographs and Memories...

02-10-2025

©2026 BTMT-TJ

Some photos stay with us not because we return to them often, but because deleting them feels like a second kind of loss.

They live quietly in forgotten folders, old albums, or the back of a drawer. We rarely open them. Still, we know exactly where they are. Letting them go would mean admitting that what they hold has fully passed, and that can feel heavier than simply leaving them untouched.

These images are more than pictures. They are proof that a moment once existed. Evidence that we laughed that way, stood beside that person, believed in something that felt real at the time. They remind us of who we were before life reshaped us, before experience refined our edges.

Even as everything else changes, those frozen seconds keep their warmth. They carry the atmosphere of days we cannot return to, and sometimes it feels kinder to preserve them than to confront what their absence would confirm. Keeping them allows the past to remain acknowledged rather than erased.

Some photos ache to look at. They stir memories we thought had settled, emotions we believed we had already carried to completion. Still, they remain. Not out of longing, but out of respect. Like old letters kept in a box, untouched yet treasured. It is not about reopening the story. It is about honoring that it existed.

Perhaps one day we will look at them again. Perhaps we will not. Even so, there is comfort in knowing they are there. Somewhere, a younger version of us is still smiling, still hopeful, still reaching toward a future they believed in.

We keep these images because they remind us that we once showed up fully. That time moved forward, yet some moments were meaningful enough to save. Not to relive them, but to remember that they were real, and so were we.

-TJ

.

. 

 

7 Things That Cause Hurt and Pain

1. Realizing that you’ve lost them

and can never have them back
 
2. Reliving the old memories

and the fun times you had
 
3. Pretending that you’re happy

when you’re miserable and sad 
 
4. Being obsessed with the wrong person

who will never love you back 
 
5. Regretting how you acted,

or the careless things you said
 
6. Recognizing it’s your fault

that things have turned out bad 
 
7. Being abandoned or rejected

by your friends or family

KJ

Your Life

Your life is a highlight reel: a gradual search for a handful of memories. We like to think that every moment has potential, that there’s something transcendent, hidden all around, that if you would only stop to seize the day, you could hold onto it and carry it with you. But the truth is, most of life is forgotten instantly, almost as it’s happening. Chances are that even a day like today will slip through your fingers and dissolve into oblivion, washed clean by the tides.

This is the rhythm of ordinary time: the featureless stretches between one memory and the next, the thousand acts of maintenance you do every day. You keep your body going, hauling it back and forth from one place to the next. You breathe in and out. Things fall apart, you clean up the mess. And it all washes away in the night, to be built up again in the morning. You throw the week against the wall to see what sticks, hoping you will remember something that happened today, anything.

Most of our lives are spent in the wilderness, those areas we fly over to get to the good parts. And you wonder how you could spend so much time just pushing back against the current, trying to keep your small boat afloat, watching for a glimmer on the horizon, waiting for those moments when you can finally say, “I’ve found it!”

But it’s all happening. It’s all real whether you’ll remember it or not. So you might as well say "I've lost it!" As if to mark the passage of yet another opportunity, flushed down the hourglass. A final toast to the endless forgotten days, whose humble labor has given you everything you have, at least for the moment.

As the song says: long live the high tide and long live the low, but above all, long live the difference.

TJ

Can You Pause Life?

 

Strange how strong the instinct is, to see something incredible, and reach for a camera. As if to lend it some credibility, to prove that it's real, that 'I WAS HERE.' 

We live our lives in moments. Those rare experiences we stop to notice, and carry with us, in the hopes of stringing them together, trying to tell a story. But even in the moment, you can feel it start to fade.

So you try to capture it, and convert it into something that will last longer than just a flash. And over time a photo feels more real than it's subject. It lets you build a version of the world that you can take with you. 

A world flattened, and simple. A world that doesn't change. That fits in the frame. A little brighter and more colorful. With everything under control. You can travel the world looking for memories, and still find yourself standing behind a camera waiting for the world to hold still. 

With every click of the shutter, you're trying to press Pause on your life. If only so you can feel a little more comfortable moving on living in a world stuck on Play. 

A part of you knows you can't take it with you but that doesn't stop you from trying.

 "What if I could stay just a little longer?" "What if we didn't have to go?" 

We try to capture moments as if we're afraid they'll escape, but they'll get away eventually. 

Take one last look. One more shot. 

So years from now you can flip back through, and try to relive it all over again.

But maybe even then, you'll be thinking to yourself,

 

 "Ah well. I guess you had to be there."

 

 

 

TMJ

 

Have You Become Emotionally Numb?

When we experience mild to severe feelings of detachment to the point it’s hard for us to access normal feelings any more, in that moment we are experiencing emotional numbness.

This includes both positive and negative emotions because you can’t just shut off one feeling. Common causes of emotional numbness include different types of stress and/or pain… from receiving bad news … to being in an accident … to recovering from the death of someone close … to a relationship breakup … to feeling deeply humiliated or ashamed.

So how do you overcome emotional numbness?

1. The first thing to do is to choose to value and accept all emotions – no matter what they are. Also, try and grasp the fact that suppressing your emotions will likely lead to heartache and problems later on (because they will more than likely resurface at inappropriate times.)

2. Try to understand that feelings and actions are two very different, and unrelated, things. That is, you can still feel angry without becoming violent – so don’t assume your feelings will affect your actions, too.

3. Try to figure out the message behind intense emotions. Are you angry because you’ve been hurt, used or abused? Are you sad because deep down you feel that you’ll never find true love - as you can’t believe that anyone will love you for who you really are below the surface?

4. Take that risk – and find the courage to ask someone for help. If you’re honest with yourself, you’ll know that there are those who genuinely love you – like a true and caring friend. The important thing remember is to not isolate yourself, and to make the extra effort to prioritize self-care. You need other people to help you work through this.

5. Seek professional help if the symptoms persist. There are excellent counselors and therapists out there who have the training and skills to help you to shake the numbness off – so you can live a more fulfilling and healthy life.

6. Be patient with yourself. It’s likely to take time because you will need to learn to trust, and take some barriers down, so you can be yourself again (and that is often hard to do when you’ve experience hurt and pain).

TJ