If they leave you, let them. Never try to convince someone to be with you. Do not convince them to like you, to love you, to be nice to you, to stay with you. Because if you do it once, you will have to keep doing it over and over again to get them to stay. The constant push-pull will wreak havoc on your self-esteem and you will start to devalue yourself little by little.

☯️tbp

Is It Already Too Late?

 

When you were born, you could have been anybody. So quick and malleable, your parents could look at your face and see a future president. They tried to mold you as you grew, but they could only work with what they had. And when their tools stopped working, they slowly handed off to you, asking, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" There's a certain art to becoming who you are. 

A teenage personality is a delicate medium, its emotions are almost too heavy to handle. You have to keep yourself together, and tease out the good parts without stretching yourself too thin. You can never stop moving for too long, or focus on just one side of your personality, or you'll fall out of balance, and never stand on your own two feet. 

You can't ignore your flaws-you see them so clearly-but you can't just fix them either, and force yourself to change. And you need to make it look effortless, even if you keep getting burned. But the toughest thing to master is the sense that your personality is hardening over time. That the fire that kept you flexible all these years is dimming, and you're becoming set in your ways. 

You can still recall the heat of youth, that once kept you warm on a dingy couch, or a night in the wilderness, or a wandering summer. At any given time you remained untouchable, because you were 'not yourself today.' You knew that you weren't just you, you were also the person you will one day become, finding comfort in the lines, "I am not I. I am the one walking beside me...who stays calm and silent while I talk, and forgives, gently, when I hate, who walks where I am not, who will remain standing when I die." 

But now it's hard to deny that you are anyone but yourself; you are who you are, for better or for worse. For all your wondering what kind of person you were going to become, somewhere you forgot that question actually has an answer, and that 'one day' will soon arrive, if it hasn't already. Now you wonder if you can change, even if you wanted to. 

If you have enough fire in the belly to surprise yourself. Or if you're too tough and cynical to stretch without shattering. Of course, maybe who you are is just fine, and dreaming of being someone else would only keep you from being your best self. Or maybe that doesn't really matter.

Maybe it's already too late...

 

The Bass Player

*

 

“All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.”

According to Blaise Pascal, we fear the silence of existence, we dread boredom and instead choose aimless distraction, and we can’t help but run from the problems of our emotions into the false comforts of the mind.

The issue at the root, essentially,

is that we never learn the art of solitude.

~TBP

 

02-09-2021

 

 

AUTHENTIC LIFE - Notes From a Pandemic

 

Self-Centered - Notes From a Pandemic

 

CHALLENGES - Notes From a Pandemic

 

What Path Are You On?

 

 4:21 a.m.
It is possible to take a path that will lead you nowhere — well, nowhere you want to be in life.

This path you accidentally take is a result of the small decisions you make every day. They are decisions you make all the time that don't always seem very important, and in many cases you are not even aware them. These thoughts often come disguised as excuses or things you tell yourself on repeat or decisions you don’t see as life-changing when in fact they are very significant.

Long ago I shelved everything inside of me and walked down the path of mediocrity for many years. I woke up every day feeling like I wasn’t the right person. It felt weird. All of my hopes remained hopes and any opportunities to embrace who I was or what I wanted were ignored.

In light of breaking free of this temporary, semi-isolated, existence we all find ourselves in at this moment, do you really want to continue to accidentally walk down the path of mediocrity and be separated from where you want to be in life?

Instead how about you try to keep going when you don’t feel like it, be the best you can be to the people that matter and remember quality is subjective, examine every part of your life and remove the things that cause atrophy, and do the small things well.

We are not born mediocre. We make little decisions day by day that lead us down the path we call “unsuccessful”. So remember, if they are decisions we make, that means we are in control and we can get on the right path.

 

TJ

What Do You Want From Life?

Living life on your own terms isn’t just about doing what you want when you want — it’s about finding the meaning, purpose and value in your life by reconnecting with the passions and talents that make you the unique and beautiful person that you are. If you want to take control of your life, you have to define what that life is and what it means to you.

 

TJ

COVID-19 and LOVE

Wouldn’t it be great to see people stop being so self-centered with all the hoarding and stockpiling right now and reach out to friends and family who might need help instead? Also, do we really need more fear mongering, and that includes all the empty shelf posts on social media? The news is doing a great job selling fear, hysteria, and division while laughing all the way to the bank on sponsor $$$$$$$$. Could everyone take a breath, practice good hygiene (it amazes me we have to teach it to adults), help those in need (infirm, elderly, disabled), and love one another.
TJ

©TJACKSON2020

3:00 a.m. Challenge

About 3:00am this morning these thoughts were running through my head. I scribbled some notes and then stared at the ceiling for 3 more hours. -

When we least expect it, life sends us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change. When the challenge arises there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or complain about not being ready to face it yet. The challenge will come.

Life does does not stop nor move backward for anyone. The moment we are challenged is the proper time for us to decide whether or not we will accept the change life is going to require us to make.

The alternative to facing the challenge head-on will most often negatively impact our life in ways that will be even more difficult to overcome.

Meet your challenges head-on. It is always the best way to move forward in life.

©2020KJackson

Authentic Self

For every day in the valley, there will be way more mountaintop experiences, picture-perfect highs, and cinematic nights.

Even the harshest feelings will peak and crash, and even the most dramatic catastrophes will fade over time. You will not remember the hours you spent crying or walking off your emotions. What you will remember is what you learned. What you will remember is what you saw. What you will remember is gratitude.

For everything we cannot control in life, there is so much more we can. We do not need to correct every single setback. We do not need to avoid the hard days altogether.

Sometimes the best way to clear muddy water is to just leave it alone.

To succeed, we must fail. To be beautiful, we must embrace our uniqueness and see ourselves as enough. To learn, we must try. To be better, we must brave our inner storms. We are not meant to heal ourselves to the point of perfection. We are meant to be human, and when we allow ourselves to live authentically, our lives will help us heal.

KJ

Perception...

Perception is a very tricky topic.

If we are talking about the material world (physical realm) I believe that the reality of a situation is based upon the correspondence view of what is true (real).

Metaphysically speaking, as I suppose we should be engaged in doing within this forum, perceptions could be described as, “what is there?” and “what is it like?”

This topic could encompass volumes of writing, but within this forum there is a need to be brief.

I have used the following many times to illustrate how perceptions can differ, but reality is static. If I say, “The grass is green,” I have offered my perception of what I believe the grass to look like. That perception is based on light emanating from the sun (or some artificial source), reflecting of off the grass, enters through the cornea, passes through the lens which bends the light, which then passes through the vitreous gel, and then is focused on the surface of the retina which contains the rods and cones. From there it travels via electrical impulses to the brain through the optical nerve. Is my perception accurate?

That depends on several factors. Is the pathway the light travels through my eye healthy and “normal?” Does my brain process the electrical impulse correctly? Do I have the cognitive ability to decode the information? Finally, is the grass, in fact, green? If the grass is green, and I am healthy and/or at least functioning correctly, I am accurate in my assessment. At that point, the grass being green makes the content of my perception true.

However, is it a true statement to say, “The grass is green,” if I am blind? Not only is it an accurate statement, it would an accurate perception even if I did not believe it to be true. It is reality that makes our perceptions true or false. I posit that it is through evidence that we determine if our perceptions are in tune with reality.

KJ