“All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.”

According to Blaise Pascal, we fear the silence of existence, we dread boredom and instead choose aimless distraction, and we can’t help but run from the problems of our emotions into the false comforts of the mind.

The issue at the root, essentially,

is that we never learn the art of solitude.

~TBP

 

02-09-2021

 

 

AUTHENTIC LIFE - Notes From a Pandemic

 

What Path Are You On?

 

 4:21 a.m.
It is possible to take a path that will lead you nowhere — well, nowhere you want to be in life.

This path you accidentally take is a result of the small decisions you make every day. They are decisions you make all the time that don't always seem very important, and in many cases you are not even aware them. These thoughts often come disguised as excuses or things you tell yourself on repeat or decisions you don’t see as life-changing when in fact they are very significant.

Long ago I shelved everything inside of me and walked down the path of mediocrity for many years. I woke up every day feeling like I wasn’t the right person. It felt weird. All of my hopes remained hopes and any opportunities to embrace who I was or what I wanted were ignored.

In light of breaking free of this temporary, semi-isolated, existence we all find ourselves in at this moment, do you really want to continue to accidentally walk down the path of mediocrity and be separated from where you want to be in life?

Instead how about you try to keep going when you don’t feel like it, be the best you can be to the people that matter and remember quality is subjective, examine every part of your life and remove the things that cause atrophy, and do the small things well.

We are not born mediocre. We make little decisions day by day that lead us down the path we call “unsuccessful”. So remember, if they are decisions we make, that means we are in control and we can get on the right path.

 

TJ

How to Know Yourself Better

1. If you could change one aspect of your life or personality, what would it be? 

2. Are you “your own person” or are you defined and pushed around by others?

3. Is there any area of your life where you feel out of control? 

4. Do you feel more comfortable in an organized or chaotic environment? 

5. How comfortable are you with spontaneous ideas, or a last-minute change in plans? 

6. Do you feel renewed by being around others, or is it crucial for you to have time on your own? 

7. Are you motivated, or undermined, by competition? 

8. Do you work well under pressure, or do you tend to fall apart? 

9. Are you better at praising and complimenting others, or at consciously affirming and building yourself up? 

10. Are you a morning or an evening person? 

11. Do you persevere, or do you give up easily? 

12. Do you like to go with the flow, or take control of your own life? 

13. Are you more of a thinker or a feeler? 

14. What are your passions and goals? 

15. What would your perfect day look like?

KJ

We All Wear Masks

 

Our true identity is often hidden behind the masks we wear.

Masks contain complete social representations of who we are.

Others look at the mask each of us is wearing and understands what it represents, and they know what mask to wear themselves.

We have all seen a masked formal ball in a movie or on television.

Each person wearing a mask and dancing with one another with each person’s true-self safely concealed beneath.

Masks protect us and facilitate our interaction with others.

We each wear a specially chosen mask in different situations to be the people we want, or in some cases need, to be.

Masks may be provided by others who want to force people into various cultural roles.

Masks provide a position of safety as we hide our anxieties behind masks of power and security.

We wear layers of masks, so that if one is removed, the true-self is not found beneath, but just another mask.

There is nothing new about the metaphor of wearing masks. We wear them to protect our vulnerable inner true-selves. We also need to fit in with society and wear masks that project social conformance. 

Masks can, and very often they do, lie as we try to hide our true-selves. It only seems fair to wear misleading masks to help insure our protection and acceptance. They are useful as positive forms of coping mechanisms that help us to handle the difficulties of social life.

Who are you under that mask...really...who are you?

 

TJ

 

 

 

10 Things That Can Wreck Your Life

1. Not living in the moment. Always wishing you were somewhere else, doing something different with other people. 

2. Blaming your problems on your past. Although the past affects us, it need not define us. We can choose, decide and act – and take control of our lives. Don’t let your past heartache and pain affect who you become. 

3. Running away from problems. It’s pointless to bury your head in the sand and pretend that things are fine when you’re dealing with a problem. Face reality, take action and work to turn things round. 

4. Being ungrateful. Being thankful sets you free in your heart and mind. It inspires all that’s good and, also, oils relationships. But an ungrateful person will wear others down. It destroys your spirit, and it saps your energy. 

5. Being angry and bitter. Refusing to forgive and bearing grudges against others will slowly poison our personality. It’s much better to release them and to focus, instead, on living a happy and fulfilling life. 

6. Letting your expectations rule your life. Life rarely goes smoothly and according to plan – and people disappoint us and let us down. Accepting this is normal takes some tension out of life.

7. Disrespecting yourself and others. Every single person deserves respect, and every single person is fighting their own battle. So focus on being kind, understanding and forgiving. 

8. Neglecting important relationship. A relationship that’s built on unconditional love – where a person accepts us for who and what we are – is truly a gift and is worth fighting for. Don’t take it for granted – recognize that it’s a gift. 

9. Loving people who are bad for us. Not every person will build into your life. Be aware of those who who’ll use you, or who want to bring you down, or who want to hurt you, or destroy your confidence. 

10. Never taking risks. If you always play it safe, you’ll find you end up going nowhere. You must be ready and willing to take risks. If you don’t, you may regret it as you’ll miss so much in life. 

TJ 

Thinking About The Past

Your life is written in permanent ink. There's no going back to erase the past, tweak your mistakes, or fill in missed opportunities. When the moment's over, your fate is sealed. 

Are you sure?

Maybe, if you look a little closer, you will notice that the ink never really dries on any of our experiences. These experiences change their meaning the longer you look at them.

There are more ways of thinking about the past than just nostalgia or regret. There is also a kind of questioning that enhances an experience after the fact. To really contemplate the past is to allow fresh context to be introduced over the years to fill out the picture. 

This helps us to keep the memory alive, so it does not become just a caricature of itself. It helps us because we can look honestly at a painful experience, and call it by its name.

Time is the most powerful force in the universe. It can turn a giant into someone completely human, just trying to make their way through life. Or time can tell you how you really felt about someone, even if you couldn't feel it or say it at the time. It can put your childhood dreams in context with adult problems or turn a universal consensus into an embarrassing fad. It can expose cracks in a relationship that once seemed perfect.

Or time can keep a friendship going through thoughts alone, even if you'll never see them again. Time can cause a complete 180 degree turn and make your greatest shame into the source of your greatest power, or time can turn a moment of pride into something nice, but done for the wrong reasons.

Time can also make what felt like the end of the world look like a natural part of life.

For just about everyone, the past is still mostly a blank page, so we may be doomed to repeat it. However, the past is still worth considering if it brings you closer to the truth.

Maybe it's not so bad to dwell in the past, and walk around in the memories, to lessen the simplification of time, and put some effort into reconstructing it.

Maybe we should think of memory itself as an art form, in which the real work begins as soon as the paint hits the canvas. And remember that a work of art is never finished, only abandoned.

TJ